This post is a little different from most of my posts. It suggests an activity that has been helpful to me, and I wanted to share it with you.

A Daily Self-Care List

Here is a little background information. I begin each day by jotting down what I plan to do that day for self-care, a reminder that self-care needs to be at the top of the day’s To Do List.

My usual self-care list includes:

• Meditation
• One or two walks around the neighborhood, whatever my cranky back will allow
• A short online exercise (YouTube is great for these)
• A commitment to “stand and stretch” after every hour at the computer

Recently I began to sense that something was missing. My self-care regimen needed to include time for something I labeled “creative thinking.”

This would not be a time for worrying, long-ago nostalgia or problem solving. It would be creative, for the “now.”

Knowing Ourselves Well

One of the wisdoms that comes with being an old person is that we know ourselves well. If we look back, we can recognize who have been the most positively influential people in our lives, those who have served as mentors and supports. We can also recognize what experiences have been most influential in a helpful way in shaping the self that we are today.

We can also reflect on who we have influenced. The creation and support of self, ours and others, is bi-directional, multi-directional and always contextual.

Holding On to Our Sense of Self

With all the challenges and changes we meet and address through the aging process, perhaps the most overarching challenge is how to maintain our sense of self. We look different and act differently, perform differently and think differently, and the only thing permanent is change itself.

We need time with others, and others need time with us.

How successful we are in adapting and accommodating necessary change informs how well we are able to continue to get our needs met. To add to the challenge, our support of others’ sense of self reciprocally supports our own.

There has been considerable attention recently to older adults’ need for social interaction, and to the danger of loneliness and excessive aloneness. That danger is mitigated by human interaction, which helps by providing support in both directions.

I recognize you as you know yourself to be. You recognize me as I know myself to be. We need time with others, and others need time with us.

The Activity

Who have been, or are, the most influential people in a helpful way?

What experiences have been, or are, most influential in a helpful way?

Who have I influenced, or do I influence, in a helpful way?

Reflecting on the Activity

• How long did you allot yourself for “creative thinking”?
• How did you feel when it was over?
• Did any helpful thoughts or suggestions come to you?

Contact me. I’d love to hear back from you, especially about any creative ways you’ve put this to use.

Photo by the Rosowsky Family